I will tear them limb from limb...

O.K.  So no I won't.  But damn I sure want to.  Who are "them" you ask?  The people that hurt MY people.

I am a GREAT listener.  Always have been, always will be.  I don't know why, but people have always been able to feel free to emotionally vomit all over me with the confidence that I'm NOT one of "those" people who will tell them it's going to one day be a beautiful flower bed and smell nice.  I'm not going to tell them everything is o.k. when it is so obviously NOT o.k. for them at that moment or on that day or even that week, month or year.  I'm not the fixer and won't tell them to go lie down somewhere while I clean up the mess on the floor of their soul.  I've learned through my own personal experience that it's just part of LIFE (Living In Full Everyday) which means that sometimes being FINE (Fucked-up Insecure Neurotic Emotional) is all I've got to offer the day. 

Sometimes, I am NOT o.k., and I've accepted that THAT'S o.k. too.  Learning this about myself has enabled me to accept it from others.  People suffer pain, loss, anguish, anger, despair, sadness and self-pity, it's just what happens.  It's not fair.  It sucks.  It happens to my favorite people as well as the ones I can't stand.  It's what brings us all to the same level really.  Our happiness meters rarely EVER register at the same level as someone else's, but when it comes to that pain that literally makes you feel like your heart is being squeezed in your chest and your guts have fallen somewhere too far to reach?  We, as humans being, can ALL relate to that.

It's at these times, when someone I actually truly CARE for, is in that deep, to the core, pain, that I just want to track down the source of their wound and "tear them limb from limb."  I can't take the hurt away from them, so I'd like to remove it's cause.  That seems fair.  That seems like it would make the situation suck less.  Yet I have never done that and most likely never will.  Because 95 times out of 100, it really wouldn't make a damn bit of difference and the other 5 times the source has removed themselves in such a way that they can't be removed twice (death beats rock/paper/scissors every time).

Anyway, as you might have guessed, there a few people in my life right now that are in pain.  I've reached out or reached back when they've reached first.  I listen with an open mind and an open heart, because I know first hand how much that means, to be able to just get it all out of your head to try and make sense of it all FOR YOURSELF, not to someone else.  It doesn't HAVE to make sense to ME.  It's not my LIFE.  I don't have to face the next day in their skin.  All I can do is let them know it's o.k., not to be o.k. and that they have someone who gives a shit and will walk through the dark with them if they'd like.  And I've got mad dark angel skills, so if anyone trys to fuck with them while they're trying to heal, they're gonna get a smack down...  I mean, I can't fix what has already harmed them, but I'll be damned if I let some vulture pick at them while they're down.

I got your back my friend.  You do what you need to do to get through the process.  I'll be here the whole time.  I won't be holdin' your hand or shovin' you in the direction I think is best, but I'm here when you WANT some help.  No way around, over or under the pain, gotta walk all the way through it.  I can relate.